have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
