Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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