don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
