So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
