i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
