I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
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