For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize