Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
