Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize