I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
