god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
My boob is missing a layer of skin
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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