if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
