you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
