Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
