this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I fill condoms, not promises.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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