Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
