I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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