guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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