i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
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