I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize
