just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Randomize
