Your tits are I can't wait for
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
