Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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