Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
