She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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