I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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