so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
