the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
