Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
