I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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