she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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