We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
