Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
