i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
