Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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