He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
