There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
