Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
