You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Randomize
