You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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