This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
