i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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