My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
