her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
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