He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
barbara walters just said penis...
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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