Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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