Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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