ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
