honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
