didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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