Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Say something about gay babies.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
