Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
