Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Randomize
